Wednesday, October 15, 2014

October 15

Today is October 15th. 
To many, this is an ordinary day. This year, it falls on a Wednesday. For Matt and I, this day means so much to us. So much.
This is the day, three years ago, that we joined together in marriage on a gorgeous Saturday on a ranch in Masonville, Colorado! It began an amazing journey that we are so grateful for...one that God has grown, changed, encouraged, and worked through. Our love grows each and every day as we learn the real meaning of marriage and what Biblical love is. Today, we celebrate our third wedding anniversary!
On this day as well, and something that we haven't shared publicly (although some may know), we also experienced loss on this day...
Two years ago, Matt and I experienced a heart-breaking miscarriage. It was not only one sweet baby, but we believe it to have been twin babies. I can't begin to explain the pain of this soul-shaking and unexpected experience. It is a grief that still affects us today, and a loss that we will never, ever forget. I think about them still and often...and it's almost like it happened yesterday.
We cremated them, and we named them Laine and Grace. We felt that Laine is representative of the path these two sweet babies paved for our future children. Grace was representative of God's grace in situations like these. We also knew that we needed to honor their sweet little lives by doing this; so incredibly challenging yet healing. We don't know the reasons my pregnancy couldn't continue, but God does, and His grace is what gently walked us through each and every mourning moment. We planted a tree and sprinkled their ashes in the mountains to honor them as well. One day, we will meet our precious babies in Heaven and we live with that hope and expectation...
October 15th is also Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day! To all the mothers and fathers who have experienced loss like this...know you are not alone, and that it doesn't have to be a private struggle. So many parents have walked through this, and it's important to know that your baby or babies will never be forgotten. We can and will always remember them.
Our due date for our sweet baby Emily Grace was October 15, too! When we went to the doctor and found out her due date was October 15 (one year after our miscarriage), I cried! I cried because in that very moment I knew that God's redemption was the reason. It is God's sweet plan of redemption that this date was her due date. During my entire pregnancy with her, we knew of the story God wants to tell of His love and character. He desires to redeem everything...every part of our heart and every part of our pain.
Emily didn't come on her "due date" but we didn't necessarily expect her to (babies normally don't). This day will always represent a story of our Father's plan. She is a precious, precious gift and she brings so, so much joy to us everyday! And her little sister will join us in February! 

He started a good work three years ago as we joined together in marriage and He continues the work through His redemption, no matter the circumstances...through immense pain and amazing joy!
October 15...a day in our lives that reveals a loving God who desires to redeem everything. His love is unfathomable. His intentionality is beyond comprehension. His healing is unmistakeable.
Thank you, Lord...for this day. For your story, your plan, and your sweet redemption. We will never forget the meaning of this day.



2 comments:

  1. What a truly amazing day! It is hard to understand Gods plan but the unexpected things that happen is just a reminder that God is ALWAYS in control and why we must TRUST Him.

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  2. I have a beautiful picture of two blond babies running toward their mother as she enters the gates of heaven. May God bless you!

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